I am finishing up my second week of being on my own with both Asher and Ava. I will say that I feel more comfortable than I did last week. I remember being terrified on the eve of Eric returning to work and wondering how I was going to manage it all. And how would Asher be after having his daddy around for two whole weeks and giving him the bulk of the attention? We did have some bumpy parts, but guess what? We survived! And then my mom came, and I breathed a sigh of relief. But then she left, and I was back to being on my own again. Bummer! But I am really starting to get my footing and am on my way to feeling like a pro...although even when you feel completely comfortable, kids have a way of knocking you off your feet and reminding you that they can turn things upside down at the drop of a hat!
My biggest goal lately is practicing patience with Asher. As helpful and sweet as he can be, he can also be a real tyrant and irk me to the millionth degree. He is still adjusting, although it's gotten better. On rough days, he is extremely whiny and defiant and refuses to listen to anything I say. And then if you tell him to NOT do something, then by golly, he will continue to do it with all his might and put even more energy into it! Last week, I found myself getting constantly frustrated with him and being way snappier than usual. I was feeling like a horrible mom, and I knew Asher deserved so much better. So, I am really, really trying to take deep breaths and not be as reactive. If he is being a little too aggressive with Ava (sometimes he puts his weight on her when he kisses her or practically smothers her with his head!), I try and deal with it calmly and then distract him with something rather than telling him a hundred times to stop it already.
Ava is such a love, and we all just adore her (post to follow with more details on how she is doing)!
Ava is such a love, and we all just adore her (post to follow with more details on how she is doing)!
Overall, if I could pick one word to describe life with two kids it would be busy! I thought I was a good multi-tasker when I was in the workforce, but balancing a newborn and toddler, especially when both are crying and hungry and poopy, takes it to a new level!
3 comments:
When both kids need to be fed is one of the hardest times, I feel your pain! When April was smaller I would sit at the table and feed her while Lily was eating lunch a lot of times.
Someone told me that having one child changes your lifestyle but having two changes your stress level and I totally agree.
I have had many snappy moments at Lily, especially around the move when I was really stressed. It's soooooo hard... what can I say. My hardest time was bedtime, when I was just DONE and Lily was really wanting to test me. I finally kind of got Zen about it by reminding myself that every day is a marathon and bedtime is the last mile... if I can just make it, another day will be done!
I can't even imagine! I'm sure you are harder on yourself than you deserve though....try to keep celebrating your successes!
That "torn between the two" stress is really hard! And you want to be more patient, etc, but there's a whole nother person who needs you RIGHT NOW. It doesn't help to say it, probably, but it's totally normal and it WILL ease up. Or you get used to it and balance it better... or your children learn to share mommy a little better... anyway, somehow it does seem a little bit less, in general, as time goes by. *hug* And you're doing great, those kids are VERY blessed.
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